Love is for When it is Hard.

There is a song by Edwin McCain, “Boom”, written during painful life circumstances he and his family faced. His wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, his mother was diagnosed with ovarian cancer, and his son was in a horrific accident. The song speaks to the beauty of hurt and love.  When I heard it for my first time, my memory of meeting Edwin and his wife over dinner and conversation at The Landing on Harbour Island flooded my mind.

They had that spark, that connection that lights up a room.  The type of love single women dream over when hopefully romanticizing their future husband. When a couple faces a serious illness together, it can make or break their bond. I recently interviewed a cancer thriver who found the love of his life while going through his personal cancer journey. He said, ‘cancer or serious illness can make good relationships great or bad relationships broken.”

It’s true. My own personal journey with illness and cancer was not easy. These experiences changed me. I looked at the world in a different light. Becoming grateful for each day, because to me each sunrise and sunset was a gift. I hurdled cervical and ovarian cancer before I was even twenty five.

Life was never the same for me after I turned 22 years old. We all face life experiences that change us. Things that make us grow. We become people we never thought we would be. When life happens, it is typically unexpectedly.

This past week, life happened. Life reminded me I was not invincible. And yet, the most incredible thing came from that phone call from the doctor. The love between me and my soon to be husband, blossomed to a deeper level, I never knew I could feel. 

Through the phone he whispered, “I’ll hold your hand.”

I feel that life tests us. Alters our being. Helps us from becoming complacent, and allows us the opportunity to embrace things at a deeper level. We face pain, fear, hurt, and love head on.

As Edwin McCain sings,

“Love doesn’t wait until it’s easy

Love isn’t only dancing under the stars

Love’s not rolling along like a summer song

Love’s for when it’s hard.”

Sometimes we don’t have a choice on the way the cookie crumbles. Things happen beyond our control. When we get a “boom”, our attitude will make or break the experience. This past week was the exact reminder I needed. A reminder of the simple things I am not willing to live without in my life.

Edwin and his wife, they understood that love was giving. Love was for when it was hard. If it was easy, everyone would do it. Their true grit carried them through a crucial moment in life.

Choosing love is the ultimate gift of giving.

Whenever life happens, remember, Love is for when it is hard.

Published in Bella Grace Magazine Issue 13